The TMB-MadLib!!

Sometime this summer, when we thought we had some free time (silly, silly thought), we started this whole TMBG madlib thing...because somebody on the list suggested that it made a great combo--TMBG and madlibs, that is--and we agreed. So, we made up a little generic story, and requested lists of words from TMBG lyrics...We got lots of great lists, and are finally publishing the results now.

First, we'll give you the list of necessary words, in case you want to do this yourself (don't ask me how--I guess the easiest way would be to cut and paste everything into a word processing file....):


The List (remember everything should be from a Tmb-song lyric)

ADJECTIVE:
OCCUPATION:
NAME:
VERB:
ADVERB:
VERB:
EXCLAMATION:
PLACE:
NOUN:
NOUN:
FORM OF TRANSPORTATION:
PLACE:
NUMBER:
VERB:
VERB:
VERB:
PLACE:
EXCLAMATION:
ADJECTIVE:

And now, the story, with blanks:
Once upon a time, there was a (adj) (occupation) named (name), who spent most of his/her time (verb). One day, s/he was surprised to discover that s/he had (adverb) (verb). "(exclamation)!!" s/he said, "What should I do now?" S/he thought for a moment, then went to (place). There, s/he found a (noun), which was a great help. Problem solved, s/he then decided to pack up her (noun) and take the (form of transportation) to (place) for a vacation. S/he proceeded to spend the next (number) weeks (verb), (verb), and (verb). Finally, s/he returned to (place). "(exclamation)," s/he said, "It's (adj.) to be back."
The greatest hits, in no particular order:

From our friends Eric and Tasneem:

Once upon a time, there was a big Triangle Man named Piece of Dirt, who spent most of his time fighting. One day, he was surprised to discover that he had lately closed. "Istanbul!!" he said, "What should I do now?" He thought for a moment, then went to Constantinople. There, he found a crane, which was a great help. Problem solved, he then decided to pack up his birdhouse and take the spaceship to Cowtown for a vacation. He proceeded to spend the next three weeks making, digging, and watching. Finally, he returned to Hell. "Flood!," he said, "It's racist to be back."

From steph, a.k.a kumquat, a.k.a RuPaul is my mom (WISHNICK_STF@CCSUA.CTSTATEU.EDU):

Once upon a time, there was a prosthetic hypnotist named Deputy Dog, who spent most of his time throwing. One day, he was surprised to discover that he had exactly raced. "You son of a bitch!!" he said, "what should I do now?" He thought for a moment, then went to the graveyard. There, he found garlic bread, which was a great help. Problem solved, he then decided to pack up his shoehorns and take the crane to the kitchen for a vacation. He proceeded to spend the next 100 weeks digging, hammering, and whistling. Finally, he returned to Berlin. "I don't want to live in this world anymore!," he said, "It's fleshy to be back."

From Koenig Feurio (payn@scf.usc.edu):

Once upon a time, there was a purple president named Ana Ng, who spent most of her time remembering. One day, she was surprised to discover that she had vigilantly waved. "Hi-ya!! (whipcrack)" she said, "What should I do now?" She thought for a moment, then went to Cowtown. There, she found an aquarium, which was a great help. Problem solved, she then decided to pack up her snake head and take the crane to Hell for a vacation. She proceeded to spend the next 32 weeks hovering, hiding and trembling. Finally, she returned to the '64 World's Fair. "You son of a bitch, I palindrome I!," she said, "It's bulletproof to be back."

From poetzlk@stu.beloit.edu (Karl Poetzl):

Once upon a time, there was a pink shriner named Mr. Vanity Klaw, who spent most of his time sleeping. One day, he was surprised to discover that he had discretely lunged. "Heeya!! (whipcrack)" he said, "What should I do now?" He thought for a moment, then went to Cowtown. There, he found a bag of groceries, which was a great help. Problem solved, he then decided to pack up his angel and take the waterskiis to the book depository for a vacation. He proceeded to spend the next twenty thousand million weeks kissing, sacrificing and touching. Finally, he returned to Venus. "Bang bang bang!," he said, "It's funky to be back."

From mhaitkin@skidmore.EDU (meredith haitkin):

Once upon a time, there was an obsequious hypnotist of ladies named Uncle Allotheria, who spent most of his time trembling. One day, he was surprised to discover that he had confidentially bugged. "KISS ME SON OF GOD!!" he said, "What should I do now?" he thought for a moment, then went to Toddler Hiway. There, he found an ask-me button, which was a great help. Problem solved, he then decided to pack up his lower half and take the blue canary to her rear view mirror for a vacation. He proceeded to spend the next 32 weeks salivating, screaming and killing. Finally, he returned to the darkened corridor. "I DON'T WANT THE WORLD I JUST WANT YOUR HALF," he said, "It's dead to be back."

From Rachel (ST001992@BROWNVM.BITNET):

Once upon a time, there was a Turkish man in charge named Ana Ng, who spent most of her time poisoning. One day, she was surprised to discover that she had accidently salivated. "Shpidahhh!!" she said, "What should I do now?" She thought for a moment, then went to the dog show. There, she found Johnson's wax, which was a great help. Problem solved, she then decided to pack up her bags of groceries and take the boat of car to Cowtown for a vacation. She proceeded to spend the next 67 weeks outlawing, frying, and whistling. Finally, she returned to the silver spaceship. "Ding ding ding!!" she said, "It's actual size to be back."

From Jeremy Ehrlich (jehrlic@eis.calstate.edu):

Once upon a time, there was a purple hotel detective named Ana Ng, who spent most of her time getting high. One day, she was surprised to discover that she had geometrically turned around. "I will never say the word procrastinate again!!" she said, "What should I do now?" She thought for a moment, then went to Istanbul. There, she found a prosthetic forehead, which was a great help. Problem solved, she then decided to pack up her shoehorns with teeth and take the ocean vessel to Cowtown for a vacation. She proceeded to spend the next 42 weeks turning around, twisting, and kissing. Finally, she returned to where your eyes don't go. "Watch me scare you though," she said, "It's Santa's to be back."

From SnailShell@aol.com:

Once upon a time, there was a totally worthless carpenter named Thelma, who spent most of her time shaking. One day, she was surprised to discover that she had slowly twisted. "Wake up and smell the cat food!!" she said, "What should I do now?" She thought for a moment, then went to Cuba. There, she found Johnson's wax, which was a great help. Problem solved, she then decided to pack up her ribcage and take the shriner's car to Cowtown for a vacation. She proceeded to spend the next twenty-thousand-million weeks scratching, smashing, and screaming. Finally, she returned to camp. "Hammer down!," she said, "It's rabid to be back."

From the inimitable HAGGIS (CHSCLML@LUSTA.LATROBE.EDU.AU):

Once upon a time, there was a handsomer jailer named Jim Beam, who spent most of his time going on missions. One day, he was surprised to discover that he had masqueraded too much. "We are out of furniture!!" he said, "What should I do now?" He thought for a moment, then went to piece of dirt. There, he found a nightmare, which was a great help. Problem solved, he then decided to pack up his crazy garbage and take the phone to the world's address for a vacation. He proceeded to spend the next 30-35 weeks humming, dying and depressing. Finally, he returned to the back of your head. "Well, I guess I'm gonna die no matter what," he said, "It's shoddy to be back."

From "susan lyon, the tall one" (mozzer@umich.edu):

Once upon a time, there was a majestic triangle man named Mr. Horrible, who spent most of his time shaking. One day, he was surprised to discover that he had accidentally been rattling on. "Hee-yah!!!" he said, "What should I do now?" He thought for a moment, then went to cowtown! There, he found a shoehorn with teeth, which was a great help. Problem solved, he then decided to pack up his bag of groceries and take the a train to the shelf (where the groceries were taken from) for a vacation. He proceeded to spend the next 5 weeks drinking for two, pondering, and sitting. Finally, he returned to railroad apartment. "Istanbul!," he said, "It's lucky to be back."
That's it! Cool, eh? :-)

[picture of feet]